Alignment is scary. This is something I don’t think gets talked about enough and it trips people up. Their fear rises up and they start doubting themselves. They start questioning themselves. So I’m gonna say this again, alignment is scary. Following your ‘higher self’ will bring up all your shit. Answering the call of your soul will require you to do things that bring up fear for you. Things that will quite literally activate your nervous system until you teach it that you are safe. Until you recalibrate to that. Which FYI is a messy and uncomfortable process which is why having mentorship support or going to a women’s circle matters. We all need that. Nobody thrives trying to do this on their own. That’s the quickest way to feel out of your depth and then believe it’s just not possible for you (lies).
Truthfully alignment is not comfortable. When you answer the call of your soul, your shit comes up. It’s coming up to be ‘healed.’ You want a passionate relationship with ‘spark’ – all your intimacy wounds need to be faced. Hot love requires doing some deep alchemy shit. It’s not a coincidence.
You wanna be adored and treat like a Queen? Ah, your rejection sensitivity will rear its head. Those fears “Will I ever have that love?” (yes to answer your question) or “Do I get to be loved at that level?” (again yes you do) only those fears will rise up so that you can face them. Will you be brave enough to put yourself out there so authentically that you can have that deep love? When there is a risk of rejection most people won’t do that. They harden. They tell themselves they don’t really desire it (or need it) when deep down they do want that kind of love. The irony is you will still risk rejection when you don’t put yourself out there. Nobody is immune to that. Rejection is always possible, will you face that? Will you face all your abandonment fears? Your trauma from your previous relationships or the relationship that didn’t work out?
You got a dream in your heart. Will you face your fear of failing publicly? Of your loved one’s judgment? Of ‘failing’ a million times over before you break through and something takes off. When those closest to you doubt your vision, want you to be ‘realistic’ and project their fears onto you because they were never brave enough to answer the call of their soul and try something different. FYI never take advice from people who aren’t remotely fulfilled. Who’s lives you don’t want. Do not listen to them.
When you set boundaries and people don’t like it, will you stay the course and uphold them anyway? Will you decide you want more than the bare minimum relationships and people who don’t show up for you? Will you hold the standard or will you settle out of fear you’ll be all alone if you don’t? Remember ‘extreme’ loyalty is a trauma response.
So I repeat alignment is not comfortable. So next time you feel uncomfortable and it feels hard and like it’s not working, consider you’re doing it right over wronging yourself. Rather than overthinking and over-analsying your life choices lol. Some things just take a minute (or a long while depending on what it is and the need for instant gratification will kick you in the butt).
Learn to know the difference between your instinct telling you something is off versus the normal discomfort, fear and your nervous system getting activated because you’re doing things that actually matter to you and it’s scary answering the call of your highest self.
So next time when you feel uncomfortable and you find yourself ‘freaking out’ and your old friend scarcity has risen up and you’ve started doubting yourself STOP and remember it’s not because you’re doing it wrong, it’s because you’re doing it right. You ARE quite literally levelling up. Congratulations. Alchemy is happening. You are right on track. Keep going, be brave and put yourself out there. Give yourself and things time. As the saying goes “We don’t regret the things we do, we regret the things we don’t do.”
